Fictitious Love Story...
Diary of a Dangerous Game Player (1)

This fictitious love story relates the story of a beautiful game player known as Ejiro. This love story is dedicated to all the game players out there, male or female, doing it either part-time or full-time - especially the exceptionally beautiful ones like Ejiro, my once-upon-a-time fantastic love hopeful.

But, please, do not get me wrong though. I am no player and the objective of this story is not intended to condone or cheer on those engaged in the "game". At the same time, this story is similarly not meant to make unfounded generalisation that all beautiful girls are players. Matter of fact, that would certainly be an unsubstantiated fallacy indeed.

However, the intention of the story is to sound a note of caution to men who are genuinely searching for true love and the love of their lives, their soul-mates, their better half or whatever terms might be used to qualify someone of the opposite sex for whom a person has such a profound fondness and affection that cannot be replicated for some other person. Hence, the bottom line and moral lesson of this story is that not all that glitters is gold... Please, read on.

A Beautiful Damsel

When l met Ejiro l felt that l had met a beautiful angel, the sort of girl that any Nigerian man would be proud to take home to see his mother and happily announce, "Mama, look what l found! I am positive that all your worries and nagging have certainly come to an end this time. l am getting married!"

And his mother would just turn from whatever she was doing at that instant with a look of contempt and reproach that Mr. Loverboy was all too familiar with by now. But, halfway through the automatic indignation, his mother would gasp and suddenly smile after taking just one look at the pretty damsel standing before her and fall in love with her at first sight - even before being told of the girl's family background or hearing a single word from the filly.

Then Mr. Loverboy would simply grin from ear to ear with a "l told you you'd fall in love with her because l did too!" expression on his young not-so-handsome face and play King of the House, while trying to make the standing beauty feel like a Queen and go out of his way to make her feel as comfortable as she could ever be. Hehehehehehe...

But, quite honestly, without mincing words, Ejiro was the sort of girl l believe that any man would be proud to have as his girl and eagerly show off to his friends. As far as her beauty was concerned, having Ejiro as one's girl friend would make one's male friends green with envy. I mean, had you seen this girl ehn, ol' boy, you will scream "Waoh! Chineke!"

l mean, she had all the right curves at all the right places. With an average height, a spotless, well-rounded face, shapely figure, straight legs, shapely hips and thighs and a full-breasted chest - Jeeeezuz H Khrist! - even the most respectable Reverend Father would slip in his rendition during a holy communion ceremony if she happened to walk into the church at the middle of the service.

How l Met Ejiro

So, Ejiro's path and mine crossed during one of my frequent business trips between Lagos and Delta states. On that fateful day, I just could not take my eyes off her when she got into one of the popular commuter buses which l regularly used for my trips. As l was already sitting inside the vehicle and she was in the process of getting in, my brain instantly went to work as to the best approach to use to get cracking with her. Then l switched on all my masculine charm and added on a big bright smile along with it.

I need not have worried though because the way things eventually turned out, getting connected to Ejiro was like taking a piece of candy from a kid of 6 - a piece of cake, being the easiest of all activities l had engaged in in a long time. Meanwhile, l watched her movement from the point she stood outside the bus trying to get in up to the point when she finally sat inside the bus as if l was a camera man with a video camera and recording her.

She got into the vehicle and - just imagine my joy when she - chose a seat next to mine to my left and, to make it easier for me, she said "hello" and l replied "hi" while l looked at her face to study her facial expression. There was warmth and friendliness in the expression quite alright, but l did not rush her. I just bade my time and allowed her a moment respite.

I gave her a couple of minutes to settle down in her seat before l said with a voice as soft as a gentle breeze, just barely audible enough for only those within earshot to hear, "ls this your first trip to Lagos?" She did not even pretend not to have heard - like some highly pretentious Nigerian girls would do - by saying "Pardon?" Only heavens know what they pretend for when in reality they actually heard what was said. The reply was instantaneous "No." "Waoh!" l thought to myself. "Is it as easy as all that? Well, this is how mature toasting should be like!"

Then l asked her, "Business or pleasure?" She replied, "Both." lf only l knew what she really meant by that innocent-sounding reply at that time! Maybe l would have given her a wide berth rather than continue with the conversation which eventually cost me a small fortune at the end of it all.

Now l use the word "maybe" with the utmost discretion because she was the most sensationally irresistible daughter of Eve whom l had seen in a very long time - and, indeed, l had seen quite a few in my hay days as well. I firmly believe though that, had you been in my shoes and given the prevailing circumstances, you most probably would have done the same thing yourself.

Anyway, before long, Ejiro and l were talking together like long-lost friends who had just been reunited much to the amazement of some fellow pasengers sitting very close to us. There was very little that l did not enquire from her - her name, family background, educational background, work profile, relationship status. It was like asking her for a detailed resume of herself and she did not raise any objections whatsoever.

On and on I bombard her with questions while offering very little about myself; and she gladly answered all my questions. Quite frankly, the conversation was more of an employment interview rather than a man "toasting" a would-be female companion. Amazing! As if my intention was to give her a job in a large multi-national company at the end of the interview.

I observed though that she was a little bit edgy and guarded when it came to answering the question about what she did for a living. She simply replied vaguely that she was into the sale and supply of textile materials and she would not venture beyond that. To whom, where and how she did her business, she was very reluctant to disclose using the flimsy excuse that she felt tired. So l let her be on that point.

Could This Be Love?

Finally, at a point in the long and tiring journey, Ejiro fell asleep without any inhibitions whatsoever on my shoulder. I simply stared at her in utter astonishment. I just could not believe my luck. Occasionally, l would steal a peep at her and whistle to myself silently.

She looked very lovely in her flair top and green trousers with a green pair of shoes to match. Her face had light make-up which in my own candid opinion was totally unnecessary as she was too beautiful to need any sort of make-up to enhance and accentuate her beauty.

As she slept on my shoulder, her face looked brilliantly radiant in the hot midday sun and she looked even more innocent while at sleep. But, now with the benefit of hindsight, how very much mistaken l was! Ejiro was anything but innocent. I was to learn later that her trip to Lagos which brought both of us together on that fateful day was actually more of a pleasure trip than business or more of a business trip than pleasure - depending on the way you choose to look at it... Well, l will get to that shortly.

Before we alighted at our various destinations in Lagos, we exchanged contacts with me promising to call her later that evening. True to my promise, I called her on phone that evening and we spoke at length. She told me that she would stay till the weekend and return to Delta state the following Monday. When l asked her about the possibility of me seeing her before l left Lagos in two days time as that day was a Wednesday, she replied that she would be too busy meeting her suppliers and getting her supplies together to be able to see me.

So, l left Lagos without seeing her again. But, l called her every other day after that. She suddenly awoken in me very strong emotional feelings which l never thought still exist after over two years from the last time that l suffered a very severe heartbreak in my last relationship.

It is at times like this that a beautiful love song would do just nicely. I remember some of the lyrics from this song by Don Williams titled "falling again" which goes this way:

"People tell me take your time. Wait a while and clear your mind.
Give yourself some time to heal. If you fall, be sure it's real.
And before l could stop myself, Something makes me say hello
to someone on the street.
Oh heaven help me here l go again. Here l go, once again,
before this old heart could mend.
Oh heaven help me here l go again.
Here l go, like a fool, falling again"

How apt indeed! And thus began our ill-fated love affair which ended as abruptly as it had begun in just under one month to my utmost dismay and chagrin. But within that two weeks l had sent over 20 text messages to her, beside the telephone calls, professing my undying love for her. I do not think that l have composed any love messages as beautiful and as touching as the ones that l composed and sent to Ejiro during those two weeks.

Check out some sample love messages which l sent to Ejiro:

"My jewel of inestimable value, my love for you is beyond measure."

"Ejiro, my love, l just said a prayer that God send his angels to keep watch over you this night least you have a troubled sleep."

"Ejiro weds Kome - sounds pretty nice, doesn't it? I simply cannot wait to hear you say l do!"

"lt is human nature for people not to value what they have, but in my case, l will always cherish you as one cherish the most valuable of all treasures."

These are just a few of the numerous love messages that l can remember offhand which l sent to Ejiro during that time.

Ejiro, A Virus!

Unbelievable! For someone whom l barely knew from my interactions with her for just a few hours inside a public transport that was the dumbest thing which any man in my position could have done. Ejiro must be a virus!

But, before you judge me adversely, try to understand my predicament at that time.

I was lonely as can be and desperately in need of affection from the opposite sex - aside from being sex-starved by the way. After all, two years was a pretty long time. Don't you agree? And with all the signs that l saw in Ejiro l thought she was for real.

Additionally, l thought l knew enough and had enough experience about love to know when it is real and when it is not. To tell you the truth, though, l merely believed what l wanted to believe. Though l found it strange that she did not initiate any of the calls or respond to any of the messages that l sent her within those two weeks, l gave no thought to the strange behaviour. I had fallen and fallen too deep to notice for long. I suddenly had Ejiro in my entire system like a virus that would not yield to any anti-virus or antiretroviral drug. She was all the antidote that l needed for my loneliness. I just had to have her and very quick too.

The Glorious and Heavenly Encounter

Two weeks later, following a series of telephone exchanges between Ejiro and l, l "controlled" Ejiro and invited her to pay me a visit at my residence in Delta state. The appointed day came and Ejiro fulfilled her promise to visit me at my house.

But, lo and behold! I was more astounded when l saw Ejiro at my residence on that first day. She appeared to be even more beautiful than that first day we met at that bus park.

One thing that was particularly outstanding about Ejiro is that she knew how to dress to kill - of that l couldn't say for certain though, that is, if she had actually killed anyone with her beauty. Anyway, her clothes hugged her like a second skin in such a sexy and provocative way without necessarily being obscene.

On that occasion, l felt that my eyes had failed to do a complete assessment of her true beauty inside that bus. She simply had it all. And in just two or three words, she had elegance, class and style.

She spent the whole weekend with me starting from Friday evening through till Monday morning. There was absolutely no pretentiousness with Ejiro whatsoever. On my part, I was so impatient to actualise all my pent-up fantasies since coming into contact with her that as soon as she got past my front door and took a seat in my living room l started working on her with my hands, mouth and every other tool l could put to use effectively.

There was not even the slightess objection from her whatsoever. And I did so many unprintable things on her that evening that l completely forgot that we had to eat. It was when l looked at the time that l knew l had not even offered my visitor a glass of water before l started mauling her like a prisoner who had just regained his freedom and was offered a huge bowl of sweet sweet macaroni immediately following his release.

I mumbled some few words of apology and set about preparing something for my guest. It appeared that food was the last thing on her mind because when she joined me in the kitchen to assist, the next thing that occurred was for the excitement to commence all over again and we simply continued from where we stopped - forgetting everything about the unprepared food. I tell you in truth, l did not have much sleep that night.

That is the best l can do to attempt to describe what happened not only in between the sheets but everywhere in my two bedroom apartment - on the sofa, on the rug, in the kitchen and even in the bathroom - with Ejiro that Friday night. I believe the account is detailed enough and leaves very little to your imagination to complete as to what transpired between Ejiro and myself that glorious night.

What an amazing love story this is! Could this really be fictitious? It sound too real to be a fictitious love story!

A Beautiful Weekend

We stayed indoors throughout Saturday morning and afternoon playing, frolicking, watching films and generally doing what lovers do on weekends. There was never a dull moment with Ejiro. She was a highly exciting girl and fun to be with. I could communicate with her very easily. I noticed too that she talked a lot about the things that she could do and get with a lot of money. I gradually started believing that she must love money very much. And by that l do not mean just a few thousand bucks; l mean what she called in her own words "real money".

In the evening of that Saturday l took her round to see the town in my Toyota Corolla car and we ended up in a relaxation resort at the heart of the town. We took some drinks and a tasty local delicacy, spent some time there before we went back home that evening.

The activities we engaged in on Sunday was pretty much the same as Saturday. We were so preoccupied with ourselves that l even forgot about attending Church that morning. And Ejiro on her part conveniently did not bring it up. When l mentioned it casually that l was too tired to go to Church, she simply replied in a non-challant manner that God would understand. "And, besides, only one Sunday would not make any difference or disqualify you from making heaven".

And how time flies past when you are having so much fun! Quite to my utmost dismay, the weekend was over in a jiffy and it was Monday morning once again. As l was preparing for work, she was preparing to head back to where she resided some 150 kilometres away. I was so reluctant to let Ejiro leave that my demeanour changed like someone who had just heard a very sad news. No words were needed as Ejiro understood immediately and reassured me that she would visit me again the following Friday, which was only four (4) days away. My face brightened a little but there was nothing that l could do about it other than to be contented with that.

Anyway, that was one hell of a weekend! And it is a weekend that l will not forget any time soon! l wish all weekends were like that one! Hehehehehehe... She had done her "work" perfectly well too. All my frustration and loneliness had disappeared within just one weekend. Talk about sexual healing. Amazing!

The Unsuspecting Gold-digger

To make it more astonishing, she did not ask for any money to use for her transport fare to my place when she was coming that Friday. She just came at her own expense and even refused my offer of paying her transport fare back to her place. She was a high class lady (or should l say prostitute?), to say the least. Well, can you beat that? I thought l had struck gold. A girl friend who does not need a dime from me! In Nigeria? That was simply unheard of!

Right after l dropped her off at the bus park and returned to my house, l did a small circle dance around my living room for about a minute or two before l got dressed and left for work that morning.

I did not share my experience with any one throughout that day because l still could not figure out the whole scenario. But, just when l was beginning to think that l was really on to something this time, that was when l received the shocker...

The bill for my pleasurable philandering with my too-good-to-be-true beautiful angel of a player was handed over to me on phone the following day. I simply could not believe what my ear was hearing from Ejiro - a hundred thousand naira (=N=100,000) for just one weekend - precisely two (2) days and some hours - of mutual fun and enjoyment?

Haba! Even Shell does not pay that kind of money to its staff!

But she was very confident in herself. She told me that she needed the money to make some urgent delivery to a very important client within two (2) days and if she did not do it within that time she would lose both the customer and the profit she would have made on the sale.

She even went as far as telling me, "You said you love me, didn't you? Well, here is a chance for you to prove that your love for me is real and genuine, like you have professed in your numerous text messages to me." However, she did not mention anything about any repayment plan for the money that she was requesting for. In other words, the =N=100,000 she was asking for was her bill for services rendered to me that weekend - services which was of mutual benefit to both of us.

Of course, she knew she had me over a barrel - that she would get what she wanted in the end. It was a subtle threat - no =N=100,000, no love. I knew that very well. And, to make it worse, she knew l knew that. But, not for one single moment did it cross my mind as to the fate of our relationship after she got the money.

Anyway, I was not myself throughout that day after l received that phone call. I racked my brain endlessly as to where to raise that kind of money from - because pay day was still a couple of weeks away. And even at that, my take-home was nowhere near =N=100,000 at all. And the ultimatum of two (2) days was very intimidating indeed. Matter of fact, she had made it clear that if she did not get the money by midday of the following day, l should simply forget that l ever met her.

Suddenly, Ejiro didn't look so beautiful anymore. All her beauty suddenly amounted to one huge ugly and devilish beauty. But, nevertheless, l was hooked. And I had to get her the money one way or another. I just could not turn her demand down. I kept remembering that single weekend and all the untold pleasures that went with it and the possibility of many more weekends like that one.

Taken for a Sucker

Now l understood perfectly why many men who could not honestly afford their girl friends' extravagant life style turn to crime in order to be able to cater for their exorbitant needs and ultimately retain their girl friends to the excessive financial demands from them. As l simply could not turn to crime to meet Ejiro's demand, there was only one way l could get that kind of money within short notice. I had to go to my bank and obtain a recurrent overdraft.

And so l made arrangement with my bank for the money to be transferred to her account with another bank. As soon as the transfer was confirmed to me, l called her on my mobile to relay the message to her. Her "thank you" reply was so perfunctory that l was forced to look at the phone again just to be sure that l was speaking to the right person.

And when l reminded her of her promise to visit me the following Friday which was only three (3) days away, she simply replied that she would not be able to make it. To my utmost dismay, she explained that she had to attend a special night vigil programme at her Church that day.

I argued that what was so spectacular or special about this particular night vigil that she could not put off in order to see me. "After all, God would understand. Only this one night vigil will not prevent you from making heaven, will it?" using her own argument to try to persuade her and trying to laugh at the same time.

But she was not laughing at all. If anything, she was dead serious. She had become a very "Born-Again Christian" over night, telling me that she could not afford not to attend this particular night vigil. In her own words, "this night vigil is too important for me to miss. You cannot understand".

She would not be persuaded at all to do otherwise. I felt utterly deflated indeed. I lost all my self-confidence within an instant and felt very depressed like a tyre would become flat when it loses all the compressed air inside it. "So," l asked in a very small voice "will l see you on Saturday then?" "l do not know yet." was her firm reply. My fingers became clammy and sweaty instantly. With shaky hands l broke the connection. I simply could not continue with the conversation as l suddenly felt sick inside me.

"Jeeeezuz! Have l been taken for a ride?" was the question that l kept asking myself over and over again. I felt highly devastated and it showed in my composure too. I gained ten years in age in an instant.

People around me quickly noticed the change. "Who died? Why the long face?", "Kome, are you alright?", "What has happened, Mr. Itoje?" were some of the queries that l got from my colleagues in the office and even my next-door neighbour when l got home that evening.

I couldn't give them a coherent answer. I just waved at them to signify that l was okay. They understood that l wanted to be left alone and as such did not bother me further.

The following day was pretty much the same. I just went through the motion of going about my usual routine as best l could. But, the deep and nagging pain remained with me like a malevolent genie who would not be appeased. To tell you the truth, this was my first encounter ever with a game player as beautiful as Ejiro was and it shook me pretty badly.

It even affected my work too to the point that my immediate boss had to ask me if everything was alright. I simply told him that l was down with a flu or something. He was sympathetic and told me to take the day off and seek medical attention. I gladly agreed because it gave me the opportunity to leave the office which was choking and stifling me. But, rather than seek medical attention, l decided to take a shorter cut and visit the public bar instead in order to soak my problems in the ever-understanding bottle of liquor and also compose my thoughts together.

A Little Insight on this Author

At this point, let me tell you a little about myself; perhaps it might help to clear up some grey areas that you may be finding difficult to understand right now. I am not someone a girl would rave about in terms of handsomeness, but you cannot say l am ugly either.

At a glance, my physical attributes are as follows. Being a young man who was approaching 35 years of age when this story happened about two years ago, I was about 6ft tall, fair in complexion, moderately plumpy and had no pot belly like so many young men my age usually had at that time.

Well, I may not be much to look at, but my mother adored me at birth - and still do - because as her first child, l was an answer to her prayer; she wanted a boy child while my father wanted a girl. And as it turned out, my mother was overjoyed when she realised that her wish had materialised.

So, my birth was like a minor victory for her as if she and my father were participating in a contest for which the grand prize was me. Now, l wonder why the sex of a child has to be a point of conflict - no matter how trivial - among parents. Why not just accept the inevitability that a child must be born either as a boy or a girl? Anyway, it has been proven in many instances that fathers are usually closer to their first female child while mothers are closer to their first male child, especially if the child is their first born child.

Aside from this fact, l was my mother's child and she just had to love me. And, as the locals in my neighbourhood would say, "monkey nor fine, but him mama like am so". In all honesty and sincerity though, l feel that l am above average in the handsomeness department. You may take a look at my picture in the "About the Author" area of this story to make your own unbiased assessment.

Additionally, I am a very simple, easy-going guy who has some very rare qualities like sincerity, honesty and faithfulness - qualities which l am aware are lacking in many men today. And l dare add that at least 90% of modern girls, by my own estimation, do not even appreciate these qualities or even know their meaning.

As a result of this, it has always been my personal code of ethics never to double-date. As far as l am concerned, It is strictly a girl at a time. Could this be the reason why l was not a popular guy with girls and even ladies, like my next-apartment neighbour always wanted me to believe?

After Love Died - What Else?

Anyway, the remaining two (2) days preceding the next weekend after the last heart-rending phone call which l had with Ejiro went by pretty slowly for me, but l managed to keep things under control without raising any further questioning from people around me. How l was able to do this still remains a mystery to me till date.

Perhaps l had a stronger constitution than l thought and, haven gotten back my second wind, it didn't hurt as much as it had on that first day. Of course, l was not a millionaire and losing a hundred thousand naira (=N=100,000) by any means just like that was not in the least bit fun at all as that sort of money was no pocket change where l was concerned. But, what else could l do?

However, l am quite aware that many men in my position would not have taken the matter lightly the way l had done. Some men would have planned a bitter revenge on the girl by either paying hoodlums to attack and disfigure the girl using acid chemical or even resorting to black magic to cast a spell on the girl so as to either drive her insane or inflict on her a terrible incurable disease in order to teach her the "lesson of her life".

On my part, l just accepted the fact that l had been ripped off by a player and one that was very beautiful too. That is why it did not even cross my mind to call Ejiro again after that day. But, how very much mistaken l was to even think for just one second that my encounter with Ejiro had reached its end! Well, it took only one phone call to bring me back down to earth. And that happened just when l was beginning to forget about Ejiro. It was indeed an unexpected turn of events.

A Clever Actress

It was Saturday morning. I was busy tyding up my apartment when l received the call. I did not look at the phone but just picked it up, okayed the connection and said "hello" into the mouth piece. Ejiro was the last person that l was expecting to hear her voice. So, l said curtly into the phone's mouth piece, "yeah, who's this?"

Then she said in a very soft sensual voice with a lot of promise behind it, "Mr. Loverboy! Don't tell me you have forgotten your beautiful angel so soon." Did l notice a trace of sneer in her voice? Anyway, all the feelings that l nursed for her from the very first day l set eyes on her just kept surging back once again, this time with such tremendous intensity that l found it difficult to breathe.

I had to cut the connection quickly to give myself time to compose myself to pick up her call again. "She must not know what a fool l've made of myself because of her!" l told myself. Why was l behaving like a 10-yr old child who has just peed in his pants in full public glare? The phenomenon was simply unexplainable. Jeeeezuz! Who was l kidding? To be truly honest with you, I was kidding no one but myself!

So, when l was ready, l picked up the call again and said with all the calmness that l could muster. "Oh Ejiro. Is this really you? I thought l have lost you for good". "Why would you ever think that? Is it because l told you l won't be able to make it yesterday night? Now l know that you do not even trust me at all." was her prompt reply.

l suddenly found that l was apologising to her for distrusting and lacking confidence in her for even one moment. Then she said it was okay and promised that she would see me at my house that evening. She told me that she was in love with me and missed me very much and my spirits soared immediately. That was the very first time that those words came out of her mouth. Ejiro in love with me! Waoh! I couldn't wait to see Ejiro my beautiful angel once again. Oh boy! Oh boy! Oh boy! What promise of immense pleasure lay ahead!

A Player to the Core

Then began the long wait for her to arrive. I waited and waited and waited for her endlessly without seeing even a shadow of Ejiro. And to make matters worse, she was unreachable via her mobile phone right from when l started trying the line at about 4pm up till 8pm. But, little did l know that Ejiro had prepared another sad love song for me.

When l got totally fed up with waiting for her and trying her phone number, l just sat in front of the television set without actually seeing the pictures on the screen and started to drink brandy straight from the bottle without using even a wine glass.

"Oh, If only l was a player!" I exclaimed to myself. Then it would not have mattered if Ejiro came to visit me or not. As my next-apartment neighbour, Larry ldiegwono, used to "coach" me on how to develop a player's skills, he would say over and over again, "l hate to say this, my good friend, you are too soft. If l were you, Kome,"

He would pause to look at me straight in the eyes while he offered his player's skills advice, "I would simply look at her and laugh right in her face and make her understand that one way or another you do not care how she behave - make it obvious without necessarily saying it point blank that there are so many fishes in the ocean.

Take a look at my wife, for instance," he would continue, "she knows that l am a no-nonsense man. She also knows that if she does not behave herself, there is nothing stopping me from bringing in a second wife into the home or marrying another woman and renting an apartment for her within town. So, without being told, she knows that she must behave herself or face the bitter consequences. If you treat her that way," he would point a finger at me, "then she would behave herself and you will have her eating out of your palm in no time. And even if she has other men, they won't be of any use to her. And it wouldn't matter whether you give her money or not, she will always come back to you like a loyal and faithful dog - pardon my pun please. And do you know why? Because you are the only one who has succeeded in taming her".

Such words coming from the mouth of a married man. Jeeeezuz! But, l knew that everything that Larry was telling me about himself was all true. Haven known Larry now for about three years while living in the same compound, l knew him well enough the way a person knows the back of his hand. He himself could also say a thing or two about me as well. Barely over 30 years of age, Larry was the typical ladies' heart-throb any day. He was not only attractive in appearance but he also had charm and carried himself well too.

To my utter amazement, he had gotten married at the age of 27 to his youth service's (National Youth Service Corps) love, Marianne who was three years his junior at that time and equally very beautiful as well. But, this did not stop him from continuing with his profligate life. During one of his numerous extra-marital affairs, he decided to bring home one of his numerous mistresses while his wife was away on a visit to see her parents at a neighbouring state.

His wife returned earlier than scheduled and almost caught him in the act. l had to step in to save him from total embarrassment and a broken marriage on that day by instantly pretending that the girl actually came to see me. Seeing no way out of the dilemma, the girl had no choice but to toe the same line with us.

Though Larry's wife was not fooled, there simply was nothing that she could do about it. And as they would say in the law court, the case against Larry was dismissed as a result of lack of concrete and substantiated evidence. That was a narrow escape for Larry indeed as it is one thing for a woman to suspect that her husband is unfaithful to her, but it is totally a different ball game altogether for her to actually catch her husband in the act right inside her matrimonial home.

Now, l am completely aware that no Nigerian woman, no matter how gentle and accommodating she might be, would be prepared to share her husband with another woman under the same roof. On the other hand, 90% of all polygamous men who succeed in "taming" their wives - to use Larry's word - and marry additional wives originally do not set out to operate a polygamous home. But, as time go by, they find themselves yielding to this unhealthy behaviour due to a host of factors which combine together and ultimately force them to do so.

After that incident, Larry knew that he had to be more careful next time and, as such, he became more discreet about his extra-marital affairs. He did not bring his mistresses home anymore but he still kept late nights, often returning home on some occasions as late as 11pm. I tried my best to advice him to limit his late nights out - at least if for nothing else, for security reasons - but it fell on deaf ears.

However, when his wife became pregnant after almost four years of being married without anything to show for it, it was a wake-up call for him. On the part of his wife Marianne, she was beside herself with joy because, according to her, "God has taken away my reproach and given me a new song to sing. Now my husband will treat me with love, respect and understanding". That was two years ago.

And, now, the stark reality of the moment stared me squarely in the eyes without any mercy. "Oh, If only l was a player!" I exclaimed to myself once again. As a player, l would tell myself that Ejiro could go to hell and remain there for all l cared. Then l would simply drive out and have a good time at a local bar and return to the house in the company of another more beautiful damsel to take care of "business" for me. And if Ejiro happened to arrive at the crucial moment, she would either have to join the party or be forced to bow out gracefully.

But l was no player like Larry. And people hardly change from being what they are not overnight. To drive the point home, try forcing a fully matured tree to bend from the shape that it had maintained over a period of many years and see where that gets you. Absolutely nowhere!

Fit to Walk Up a Wall

And so I drank steadily from the bottle of brandy for more than 3hrs without leaving the settee on which l sat - aside from occasionally getting up to visit the bathroom to take a pee - while watching TV simultaneously until the alcohol finally took full effect. I even heard when Larry drove into the compound and l heard his wife come out to assist him in opening and shutting the gate, but l still did not move from where l sat. I heard them enter their apartment and l was grateful that they did not think of taking a peek at me.

After waiting for her till 9pm that evening without success, my mood gradually detrotriated rapidly to a very foul one. By that time I was "fit to walk up a wall", to borrow the words of "the thriller maestro of the generation", James Hadley Chase (1906-1985) (Jeeeezuz! Now, those series of novels were collector's items and they still are).

Damn that phone call! I shouted above my voice and threw the empty bottle of champaigne against the opposite wall with so much force that the splinters flew in all directions in the living room while one narrowly missed hitting me. I started behaving like someone going insane in my apartment. Thank God for the almost sound-proof manner that the apartment building that we occupied was built.

It appeared my neighbours did not hear all the noise that l was creating in my living room. Perhaps they were equally generating their own noise as well, which would account for their failure to hear me. Well, that was the beauty of an apartment building - it affords you all the privacy that you will ever need. And ours had two gates for each of the two apartments in the building.

Additionally, all the utilities in the house were separated from each other. So, there was absolutely no reason whatsoever why the occupants should ever come together if they didn't see the need in being friendly. I even jokingly told Larry on one occasion that one could commit murder successfully in the house without any other person knowing about it.

After that, l became increasingly furious with Ejiro with such intensity l never thought possible. Why the hell did she not just leave me strictly alone? After all, she got what she wanted, didn't she? I started calling Ejiro every sort of whorish names that l could come up with in the book - whore, slut, bitch, prostitute, harlot - and so many more unprintable words until l fell exhausted on the couch. Then l gradually drifted off to sleep.

A Pleasant Surprise!

I must not have slept for very long when l suddenly felt a human presence around where l slept and a soft voice calling out to me, "Oh baby. You look such a mess, dear! Have you been waiting for me for long? Oh dear! Did you have a fight with someone in here? The whole place looks as if two animals had been fighting here." Had l been waiting for her long? That was the understatement of the year! She sure deserved an oscar for her adeptness at playing her role perfectly well.

The voice sounded so far away and l thought l was dreaming. Of course, it was no dream. It was as real as real can ever be. I was so emotionally drained and fagged out with exhaustion that l was indignated with the intrusive disturbance. But, due to the persistence of the intruder, I opened my eyes slowly and looked at the direction of the voice. My vision blurred as l looked at her kneeling by my side.

Half asleep, half awake, l listened to Ejiro's soft voice as she knelt down beside me and apologised for her very apparent irresponsible behaviour.

I was only dimly aware of being practically dragged from the living room to the bed room. To tell you the truth, my mind was still hazy and dazed from the excess alcohol l had taken that evening and, as such, l cannot relate in exact detail what happened that night.

I woke up in the morning to the bright early morning sun filtering in through the window to hear the sound of someone moving about in the kitchen. My head hurt a lot so I closed my eyes again not wanting to get up as it seemed too much of an effort to do so. From the way my head was hurting, I knew that l had migraine but l only wished that it didn't get worse than it already was. My head felt like lead and equally felt as if it was coming off its joint.

Then l heard footsteps coming towards the bedroom. The door pushed open and Ejiro came in. She was fully dressed. I could tell that she had just taken her bath and she exuded a sweet-smelling aroma. She was looking great and sensational as usual, but in my present condition, l simply couldn't be bothered with her beauty. At first l just looked at her with my mouth agape, wondering if l was seeing an apparition. Then she spoke, "You are awake, dear."

lt was then that l remembered that she had come in during the night. I thought to myself: so it was no dream after all. In my stupor the previous night night, l thought l had been dreaming of her. It was later in the evening that l learnt from Larry that it was him who opened the gate of our fenced compound for her after she tried to reach me on my mobile several times without any headway and resort to banging on the gate.

An Encounter with a Ghost?

In the meantime, my mind could not recollect anything of substance which transpired between Ejiro and l after she dragged me to the bedroom. I couldn't even remember if we made love or not. Only God and Ejiro were in a position to speak on that. But, knowing the kind of girl that she was, Ejiro must have tried one or two of her usual tricks that she always had up her sleeve.

"l'm so so sorry honey", she said, "but l have to run along now. I have an important assignment to perform in church this morning. So l cannot stay. I'll make it up to you baby. I promise." Why do they always lied with the Church? I thought to myself. I was far from being persuaded at all. And then she looked at me lying down on the bed speechless and simply staring at her, too weak to even turn my head.

That eye contact was like magic. I could tell that she suddenly was struggling within herself whether to stay or not. But, eventually, she pursed her mouth determinedly and l knew that the evil side of her had won at last. She didn't look at my eyes anymore. She suddenly was in an anxious state to leave me and get the hell out. "l hate to leave you dear", she said firmly, "but, l really must go". And, like an apparition, she was gone.

I drifted back to sleep and was awoken a little later by a loud knock on my front door. I managed to struggle up into a sitting position. The person at my door called out to me from the door way. It was my neighbour. He came into the bedroom and looked at me sitting up in bed. Then he said, "Your girl told me that you are not feeling fine. Is it fever?"

That confirmed the fact that l had not seen a ghost after all. He came closer and touched my forehead. "You feel warm. That's a good sign. Have you been drinking?" When l didn't answer, he understood and didn't press the question further. So he said, "l'll make you some coffee. Would you like that?" l nodded and he left me to go about the task of preparing the coffee.

About ten minutes later, he returned with a tray containing a jug of hot water, a tea cup, coffee and some sugar cubes. I told him "no sugar" as he helped me to put some water and coffee inside the tea cup and gave it to me. I thanked him, drank the first cup, then another and yet another.

I was grateful for the coffee. That wonderful black substance gave me quick recovery and l regained some strength to move my feet from the bed to the floor but the headache was still there, though not as severe as it was when l initially woke up that morning. He apologised that he couldn't stay any longer as he had to leave for church. I thanked him once again and he left me.

After he left, l lolled in bed for some time, before l finally summoned the courage to leave the bedroom. I entered the living room and met quite a shock. The place was looking tidy. There was no tell-tale signs of the mess that l had made last night. I had a dim recollection of vomiting on the rug in my drunken state when Ejiro was moving me towards the bedroom. I looked around the area. No sign whatsoever of the vomit - it was sparkling clean. Ejiro had actually cleaned up the whole place. Ejiro, clean up? That was a new one indeed. Amazing! Wonders shall never end.

I staggered with unsteady feet to the bathroom. There was now only one thought in my mind: l needed strength and needed it like mad too! So l entered the shower and turn it on full blast on my head. The cold water that ran from my head down to my feet did a lot to revive me. After that cold shower, I regained a lot of my strength and the nagging headache suddenly vanished as if by magic.

The Investigation Begins

With my strength restored, my self-confidence soared. I suddenly found that l felt extremely hungry to the point of fainting. In the interim, l stubbornly stirred my mind away from dwelling on what made Ejiro return the previous night just after l had concluded that the story with her had reached the end point.

I entered into the kitchen, stood in the middle and surveyed the neatly arranged arena. "That's strange," l spoke out loud. I didn't remember tyding the kitchen for like two days now. It was as if l had just stumbled into another man's kitchen the way l found everything neatly arranged. It was obvious therefore that Ejiro had extended her cleaning hands into the kitchen as well.

I found this behaviour to be very strange indeed. I looked at a corner of the kitchen and found some yams as well as a half-filled bag each of rice and beans which l hardly ever touched when preparing my meals sitting in the corner looking forlorn. I also found a gallon of groundnut oil and some cooking ingredients on top of the kichen cupboard. In my adjudjed opinion they were meant strictly for unexpected guests as l did at least 70% of my feeding outside my home.

I moved towards the fridge and opened it. I found some bread, mayonnaise, macaroni and eggs in there and settled for toasted bread and fried eggs and set forth to prepare my breakfast.

As the breakfast was getting set, l re-entered the bedroom and decided to dress the bed before settling down to eat. I removed the pillows and re-tucked the pillows back into their pillow cases. Then l dusted the bed with the bedspread, put the bedspread back and tucked in the left side of the bed.

As l moved to the right side of the bed to tuck in that side, l felt my leg hit a solid metal object on the floor. I looked down and saw a mobile phone. I picked it up and looked at it. It was a Nokia flip phone, the type that was common with the ladies. I similarly noticed that the phone had been switched off either deliberately by the owner or through an empty battery power. And I did not need a soothsayer to tell me who the phone belonged to.

I immediately forgot about the bed that l was tiding and left for the living room. An instant bell started ringing in my head like someone who had just found the missing part of a jig-saw puzzle. Something in me kept telling me that the phone held the key to some hidden mysteries about Ejiro which l needed to find out. So, l decided to switch it on, then left it on the centre table and went back to the kitchen to complete my breakfast.

A few minutes later, with my breakfast in hand, l re-entered the living room and sat down. I put the meal down and decided to watch some TV. As l got up to put on the television set, the phone began to ring. I simply ignored it and continued with the motion of switching on the set. After putting on the TV set, l came back to the settee and sat down again. The phone rang some more before it stopped ringing as abruptly as it had begun.

As l sat down, the big television screen came alive. There was a documentary about migratory birds that was already in progress. I loved documentaries because l always learnt something new from them, but under the prevailing circumstances l had a very important duty to attend to and l needed all the concentration that l could gear up. So, I decided to eat first before l tackled the matter of the mobile phone.

In between my meal, the phone rang again several times consecutively and I only paused long enough to stare at the phone, but did not pick it up. Before my meal was over, the phone had rang for at least ten times in a row like a stubborn and determined inconsolable baby who simply would not stop its wailing until it got the attention it sought for.

After my meal was over and the table cleared, l belched as an indication that l was fully satisfied. That meal was a life-saver indeed. l picked up the phone and relaxed fully on the settee, dragged the centre table closer to myself and placed my feet firmly on top of it. I looked at the phone and immediately noticed that there were twelve missed calls and five messages which had been received.

An idea suddenly struck me: wasn't the phone switched off when l picked it up from the floor? I looked at the phone again. The battery signal was almost full. I looked up from the phone and stared at the wall clock which stood hung on the opposite wall. I screwed up my face in reflective thought.

So, if the phone had enough battery power in it to last for over a full day of continuous usage, why the hell was it switched off when l picked it up from the floor? Then the nickel dropped and the answer became as obvious as a neon sign on a lonely dark street: someone who had something to hide, perhaps the owner of the phone, must have deliberately switched it off to conceal something.

Now, l liked the idea that Ejiro who happened to be the owner of the phone must have actually switched off the phone by herself for certain reasons which still remained unclear to me. And the more l thought about it, the more l liked the idea since l already had a hunch that Ejiro was a player. So, l turned my attention back to the phone and commenced the small investigation.

The first thing l did was to go through the over one hundred contacts stored in the phone. I was patient as l had enough time on my hands. I know that many people would have started with the most recent messages and missed calls received on the phone. But, l saved that for last because l wanted to be thorough and it was my personal working code not approach any piece of work using the technique.

The contact check revealed the phone numbers of Ejiro's parents, some aunties, many uncles and dozens of other people with no prefix to their names as well.

l fell asleep on the chair a little later. I did not know for how long that l slept, but it was quite some time.

Fiction or Reality?

Now, if l told you that l made this story up from the beginning to the end, would you believe me? Hehehehehe... No, you wouldn't? Why? Too good to be true? Yeah! Of course, it is! Actually there is a girl called Ejiro and she is a player. Her path and mine crossed and it cost me a small fortune. Now, is that not a contradiction? Fiction? Reality? I do not know what is REAL anymore. That is what Ejiro did to me!

...to be continued.

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